This Is Hell

So the flow and rhyme in this really changes a lot, but oh well.


I grew up
far too fast
becoming an adult
when I was just a child.
Never really
had a chance
to be carefree
to just run wild.

I was the oldest of the babies
which made me the mama
when mama wasn't there.
Working so hard
just to pay the rent
that was life
and it wasn't fair.

But that's just how
my life works
doing my best
with what there is.
Putting on a smile
when I go to school
hiding myself
behind my frizz
of hair.

Losing myself in music
and writing my poems
to let out the feelings
I will never share.
Because my friends,
they think they understand
but I know that
they don't really care.

Because they don't know about my life
like they think they do.
For I never tell them
of all of the things I have been through.
Because it won't help
like they say it will
for to solve all of my problems
I need more than a big pill.

So I keep to myself
and take care of the kids
that are more like my children
than my siblings.
And I go to school every day
and get good grades
then come home and try
to deal with the rest.

When I grow up
I want to leave it all
be a new person
without this wreched past.
Just start anew
and live my life
never look back
because this,
this is hell.