If My Words Were Beautiful

I wish my words were beautiful
as they flew across the page.
I wish they could change the lives
of people of every age.
I wish people could relate to them
and aspire to be the best
at everything they love
and forget about the rest.
I wish they would be read repeatedly
and memorized by the heart
and whenever someone was hurting
it would be those words they'd start.
I wish I could write that one single line
that could never be forgotten
because those were the words you'd repeat to yourself
when life was perfect and when life was rotten.
I wish my words were scribbled across notebooks
and quoted on profiles.
I wish my words were the reason
for a million smiles.
I wish everything I wrote
was something wondrous and new
but I can't make those pretty words,
no, I'm not as talented as you.




This was inspired by one of my friends. He is an amazing writer and I wish I was half as good as he is. Seriously, the songs he writes are so beautiful and just unbelievable.

Smile :)

And here it comes,
creeping slowly,
beginning as a whisper,
growing to a shout.
Lips spread out,
open a little,
teeth appear,
they get bigger.
Cheeks raise,
dimples appear,
eyes sparkle
as they crinkle on the sides.
A small gap appears,
a black slit,
where a tiny tongue
makes it's appearance.
I wait for this every day,
I search for it in every crowd.
I try to create it with every sentence,
I picture it in every daydream.
Is this was it feels like
to be in Utopia,
where everything is perfect?
Because I swear
I could die happy right now
because I saw your smile.

New Love

And then the chemicals reacted
and the stars aligned
and my heart began racing
and the stars seemed to shine.
I smiled more frequently
and laughed extra loud
I constantly day dreamed
and walked sure and proud.
I closed me eyes wishing
we could be something more
and waited anxiously
for you to walk through the door.
I laughed at all your jokes
and sent glances your way
and I listened intently
to every word you would say.
I dreamed sweet dreams
that you and I would become an us
and prayed that today
you would walk me to my bus.
I know I've said it before
and it's not anything new
but I sweat these feelings
mean that I love you.

A New Home

I know that face
as you tell me to sit down
I've seen it so many times.
On my mother's face
every single year
throughout my whole life.
Moisture fills my eyes
but I hold it back
I'm wrong is what I'm praying.
But words crawl out of your mouth
the most venomous of spiders
speaking the words "You're staying."


4,000 miles of separation,
a 3 hour time difference,
a 6 hour flight.
About to start
the most important years
in the place I hate, dislike.
Not a single goodbye
was I able to speak
to the best of my friends.
So now I have to break the news
on the internet
tell them that now is the end.

And yet here I am,
closed in a box
of emptiness and faux smiles.
Blind to the dreams
I came so very close to
drowning in the waters of complicated trials.

I miss my home.

Neverland

I don't think I ever want to grow up...

I miss the days when we were still carefree.
I miss the days when I could still climb trees.
I miss the days when growing up was far way.
I miss the days when I would still play.
I miss the days when summer was worth looking forward to.
I miss the days when there was always something to do.
I miss the days when I would still see my friends.
I miss the days when the days had no end.
I miss the days when I didn't understand.
I wish I could fly away to Neverland.

A Bubble

This is one of my favorite poems I have ever written :)

They float around
blowing with the wind.
Swirls of rainbows
through the translucent spheres.
Reflections of happy faces
grinning with delight.
Suddenly they are children again
if only for a couple minutes.
An elixir of instant happiness,
smiles in a bottle.
circling around bodies
bobbing up and down.
So easily popped,
yet invincible to sadness.
Fragile, unbreakable,
pointless, meaningful.
A true Kodak moment
as a breath of air
creates such a beautiful moment,
a wondrous thing.
For babies, children,
teens, adults
all joining together
in this common interest.
A bubble.
And then suddenly it's gone
it's disappeared into the unknown.
One second it is flying,
the next it is dead.
A life consisting
of only several seconds.
But a life with a meaning,
a life with a purpose.
Because in those few seconds,
that rainbow ball created a smile
and it made everything good again
if only for a moment.

Stars

Starlight,
star bright,
star making me think at night.
Keeping me up with your soft, warm glow
In far away galazies
completely unknown.
A ball of light
that sparkles each night
winking and grinning, such a beautiful sight.
Granting the wishes
of the people below
showing us a nightly laser light show.
Igniting the dark blue
with white hot glares
although it's nothing new, you can't help but stare.
Uncountable millions
more than you've ever seen
shining so brightly, with their spectacular sheen.
Starlight,
star bright,
this is the reason I love the night.

Please

Turn your head
just a little to the left
look at me
see me.
Don't just see me as a girl,
see me as me
see me as more than a friend
see me as something more.
More than you have ever felt
care for me more than you have ever cared
love me more than you have ever loved
please.
Open your eyes
open your soul
open your heart
open your arms.
Wrap them around me
embrace me
hug me
please.
Let me be yours
let me be important
let me mean something
let me love you
please.

I Have A Crush On You

Hearts beating
faster, faster.
Pumping, racing,
I love you, I love you.
Smiles, grins,
wide-spread lips.
Happiness, euphoria,
Romantic, lovestruck.
Blushes, dimples,
peeking through eyelashes.
Biting lips
and laughing unnecessarily.
Giggles, giggles,
so many giggles.
Hidden glances,
hidden stares.
Singing, loud,
love songs, love songs.
Screaming, shouting,
admitting, secrets.
I believe I have a crush on you.

If I Could Fly

So I basically just wrote this in a minute (literally) as a comment on one of Christofer Drew of NeverShoutNever!'s pictures on MySpace and I really liked it. I was just trying to make something clever and nice, and I ended up really liking it. I love Christofer so this is kind of dedicated to him :)

If I could fly,
I'd fly to you
and to you I
would aways be true.
I'd stay with you
and dream good dreams
life would be good
there would be no screams.
I would be happy
and sing love songs
I would aways be wrapped
in your strong arms.
If I could fly,
it would be a wonderful thing
but I cannot fly
I do not have wings.

Heaven and Hell

I don't believe in God
this is blunt but this is true.
I did, once upon a time
but not anymore, after what I've been through.
But if you ask me if
I believe in heaven or hell.
I say yes, yes I do
and here is what I tell:

Heaven is a state of mine
you feel when life is right.
When nothing matters anymore
and you have no reason to fight.
When life isn't perfect
but you are still content
with everything that goes on in life
with whatever to you is sent.

But hell, like this, is a state of mind too
when everything is wrong.
When your soul seems to have rotten though
and life seems far too long.
When you wish you could go back and relive your life
and do everything in a different way.
When you don't believe in God anymore
that is hell, I say.

One Little Seed

Just a tiny seed
meaning vertually nothing
so small and innocent
incapable of anything.
But it grows and grows
slowly but steadily
before breaking through the ground
the tiniest of sprouts.
Water and sunshine,
caring and love,
raising this seed up
now becoming a plant.
Seconds, minutes,
hours, days,
months, years,
pass as it grows.
The planter is old
and has forgotten about this plant
that is now a tree
that neighborhood kids play in.
Climbing higher and higher
jumping to the ground
swinging form branches
wrinkled with memories.
So many memories
from so many people
so many childhoods
lived and remembered.
Stories told
to the people to come
all beginning
from one little seed.

Outside

Chirp chirp
chirp chirp
the birds sing.
Telling each other
unknown things.
A soft, cold wind
flows through the air
gently blowing
my dark brown hair.
The grass is green
and flowers grow
small but beautiful
not one bit dull.
the ground is hard
but somehow still soft.
This is a bliss you won't find
in any loft.
The trees are tall
I can't see the tops
the bark is brown
with no signs of moss.
The sun is hot
on my skin
the warmth is so great
it should be a sin.
I am outdoors
and it is great
I want to stay here forever
where there is no hate.

Good Again

I recently started liking someone and whenever a new crush starts, I'm suddenly writing a whirlwind of poems and songs. This is the fifth in less than two days :)

A sigh of love
escapes my lips.
A whispered song
admitting my feelings.
So quiet like
a sleeping mouse.
Unnoticed,
unheard,
unknown.

A poem written
for no one to read.
Filling another page in my notebook,
another addition to my blog.
Like a cough in the night,
it's there, but not heard.
A single strand of hair out of place,
seen by no one, but known by me.

I was living a sad life
completely unknown.
Going months not feeling
the love I feel now.
The hidden glances
through my curtain of hair.
Across the room,
but you don't look back.

And yet when you do,
my whole world is complete.
Everything is good again,
everything is perfect.
And when you don't
a sorrow is felt.
Why didn't you look?
Why don't you care?

And yet no one knows,
not a friend, not you.
Just me alone
feeling these unnamed feelings.
But hearing your voice, seeing your face,
even hearing your name,
is enough to please me
and make my life good again.

Looking

I looked
I saw
a friend
nothing more.
A guys
a boy
a person
I knew.
That was it
that was all
just a friend
at my school.
I looked
and looked
for years
but saw nothing.
And then
one day
I looked
again.
This time
I saw
something more.
And I
fell
in love.

Suddenly

Suddenly,
everything makes sense.
The way I tease you
and the reason we speak.
Why I bring you up in conversations
that have nothing to do with you.
Suddenly,
I understand.
Why my train of thought always leads to you
and I can't help but smile when I think of your face.
Why I've been singing love songs
with a grin on my face.
Suddenly,
I know why.
I've been looking at dresses for the upcoming dance
and I've been hoping that maybe you would ask me.
Why I wait for 11:11 to come
and cross my fingers as I wish for you.
Suddenly,
I know.
The reason why I search for you in the hallways
and look at you across the room.
I know that I really like you
and I want you to like me too.

Realization

When it began
we were just friends.
That was it,
no questions asked.
I've known you for so long
it just made sense.
But now,
I'm not so sure.
All of a sudden my heart's racing,
and I'm imagining us together.
Holding hands,
hugging,
kissing.
Your bold, blue eyes
and your golden blonde hair.
Your face of perfection
which is suddenly so beautiful.
Your ringing laugh
as I say something silly.
Your bubbly personality
and your constant smile.
You're joking ways
and your one worded texts.
You're tall, thin body
and your big soft hands.
All of these things
I never noticed before
are suddenly the gravity
holding me down.
What happened
and how
can I make it happen to you too?

You Looked At Me

I watch you from across the room
you look up, I look away.
Do you see me?
Do you know?
I hope not
and yet, I kind of wish you did.
I look for excuses
to speak to you, talk to you.
Should I say hi?
Should I ignore you?
Should I say hi, then ignore you?
Should I flirt?
Should I act shy?
Should I tell you everything?
Should I act mysterious?
Should I be this?
Should I be that?
All these questions run through my head
an explosion of decisions.
All because you looked at me.

This Is Hell

So the flow and rhyme in this really changes a lot, but oh well.


I grew up
far too fast
becoming an adult
when I was just a child.
Never really
had a chance
to be carefree
to just run wild.

I was the oldest of the babies
which made me the mama
when mama wasn't there.
Working so hard
just to pay the rent
that was life
and it wasn't fair.

But that's just how
my life works
doing my best
with what there is.
Putting on a smile
when I go to school
hiding myself
behind my frizz
of hair.

Losing myself in music
and writing my poems
to let out the feelings
I will never share.
Because my friends,
they think they understand
but I know that
they don't really care.

Because they don't know about my life
like they think they do.
For I never tell them
of all of the things I have been through.
Because it won't help
like they say it will
for to solve all of my problems
I need more than a big pill.

So I keep to myself
and take care of the kids
that are more like my children
than my siblings.
And I go to school every day
and get good grades
then come home and try
to deal with the rest.

When I grow up
I want to leave it all
be a new person
without this wreched past.
Just start anew
and live my life
never look back
because this,
this is hell.

Flower Petals In The Wind

So, I wrote this song. And it makes no sense. But it does make sense. I think I'm bipolar. Just kidding. Or not.


Flower petals in the wind
flying past my head.
My hair is blowing
a ghostly smile
is stretched across my face.
There are no feelings
yet there are many
I cannot describe myself.
Everything's happening
but nothing's happening
let's just stay like this forever.

[CHORUS 1]
He loves me,
he loves me not
the question flies
in the air
with the flower petals
in the wind
holding the answers
to everything and nothing.

Flower petals in the wind
I want a take a picture
of this beautiful moment.
So happy and blissful
but so sad and disgraceful
an angry mob of emotions
fighting for control
but everyone's winning
and nobody's winning.

[CHORUS 1]
He loves me,
he loves me not
the question flies
in the air
with the flower petals
in the wind
holding the answers
to everything and nothing.

The answer is yes
the answer is no.
It's sunny outside
I can't see through the snow.
I'm euphoric
I'm morbidly depressed.
I'm at my worst
I'm at my best.

[CHORUS 2]
He loves me,
he loves me not
I thought I knew
what I thought.
I'm 100% right
I'm 100% wrong.
There's nothing to do
but sing this song.

[CHORUS 1]
He loves me,
he loves me not
the question flies
in the air
with the flower petals
in the wind
holding the answers
to everything and nothing.

Flower petals in the wind
holding the answers.

With Love

This is for my big project of the school year that is worth 900 points. We have to write a bajillion different things in different styles and this is one of the two orginal poems I had to write. I also had to do an analysis of it :( Buttttttttt, I really like it :)


She closes the blinds
known as her eyelids,
shutting out the world
that surrounds her.

Imagining a place
that is nothing but bliss.
As calm as the fresh waters
flowing through a spring.

Where peace is a given
and the trees do the hugging,
for they have no fear
of the death a chainsaw brings.

Where the birds sing lullabies
and the animals laugh.
Where there is no such thing
as that monster called violence.

The pitter-patter of rain
sings you sleep.
Education is no longer a priviledge,
but something everyone gets.

Where a gun is a myth
known only in stories,
no more real than a dragon
blowing fire on its enemies.

Where death is something
in the distant future
that won't happen until
you are old and ready.

But this place is not real,
it is no more than a dream.
The water of the spring
is rough and deadly.

The trees need hugging
because they are dying,
although not enough people
seem to care.

The birds are screaming
with their caws
and the animals are crying
as they are killed for meat.

The rain is pouring
keeping you awake,
and only some get the education
they really, truly need.

A gun is a murderer
used every day in not just war,
but also in neighborhoods,
where a bang is heard from down the street.

Death is something
we all learn to fear
because plenty of people are dying
too young, far too young.

This worlds we live in
is full of bad
and we need to end it
with love.

1, 2, 3, 4, 5

Warm up. We got a die :)


One; You have only one chance
one chance to live your life.
When you make a mistake,
it's been made.
No going back
so learn from it.
When you have a good experience
it is forever drilled in your memory
and in the future you will look back
and relive your past.

Two; Makes up a couple
two people who love each other.
You'll get married (if you're lucky)
and live happily ever after (maybe).
Have hundreds of memorable moments together
from the time you meet to the time you die.

Three; Your years in middle school
no longer a child
but not quite a teen.
Learning the neccesities
to start high school
best friends, crushes,
teachers, preparing.

Four; Your years in high school
the years that make up the rest of your life.
Determining where you'll go to college,
and the job you choose.
Report cards and after school jobs.
Learner's permit and driver's lcense.
Boyfriends, girlfriends,
first loves, maybe.

Five; The fingers on your hand
that will feel the firsts.
The first touch as you are born,
the feel of the sandbox on the playground.
The smoothness of brand new school books
the sweaty palm of first holding hands.
The rolled up diploma being handed to you
The ring slipped onto your finger
on your wedding day.

One, two, three, four, five.
Isn't it great you learned to count?

Valentine's Day

This was a warm up from way back before Valentine's Day XD

The day is coming
both loved and dreaded.
Some people feel warm and fuzzy
while others want to be beheaded.
It is the day we celebrate love
and go out on romantic dates.
It is the day we stay at home
and eat ice-cream as we stay up late.
As couples go out and see new movies
singles stay inside and watch old ones.
As others have the times of their lives
they do their best to have fun.
Some people get broken up with
while others get asked out.
Some people curl up with a good book
and others dance and run all about.
I'm not sure what I'll do this day
I'll probably just read at home.
But at least I have my Edward Cullen
with him, I'll never be alone.

Candy Hearts

Warm Up for Creative Writing. She gave us candy hearts so I wrote about what they all said. Or more so, attempted to.


"R-U sure?"
of course I'm sure
I am 100% sure how I feel about you.
"Lovebug"
I was bit
I had no choice but I'm not complaining.
"When?"
I'm not really sure when it happened
but I do know I love you.
"Very good"
I know! It's great in fact
every time I see you I overflow in happiness.
"Awesome"
Exactly! You took the words out of my mouth
this feeling, this love, is more than awesome.
"My star"
Shining bright in the night sky
lighting all darkness.
"Nice girl"
Yes, you could say that about me
and he really is a nice boy too.
"Bye bye"
I say every day
and I can't wait for tomorrow.

Vacation

Another Creative Writing Warm Up. Today's was a stamp of some fat guy holding a bunch of cameras in a floral t-shirt.


"I need a vacation"
everyone says.
A week to get away
from their every day lives.
But why leave behind
everything you have
spend more money than you can afford
on pointless souveneirs
bought in a humid hotel
filled with annoying tourists.
Why go to "fun" places
and spend the whole day in line
waiting for something that will make you scream in terror.
Take pictures of so called "memories"
that in a hundred years
no one will care about.
They say vacations are relaxing
but I just think they're stressful.
Plane tickets, rental cars,
hotels, food, and things to do.
Why go through all that
when you could be at home
relaxing for real.
I don't need screaming children,
floral t-shirts
and pictures of fake smiles
to have fun and relax.
That's what books are for.

Primary

This is just a crappy warm up I did in Creative Writing. We do them every day and my teacher gives us something random to influence us. This day it was three buttons; red, yellow, and blue. This is what I came up with in fifteen minutes.


Red, yellow, blue
make up our world
every color in the rainbow
comes fromt he four-er three.
Purple, orange, green
all coem from red, yellow, blue.
They make up everything
that surrounds you.

The green of this school
is blue and yellow.
They make the green hat
worn by that fellow.
The shamrocks outside
or the apple you eat.
The product made from yellow and blue
can't be beat.

Except for purple
that comes from blue and red.
It is my personal favorite
that being said.
The purple of your bedroom
comes from (you guessed it!) red and blue.
The purple literature textbook
comes from them too.

Orange is the product
of red and yellow.
The hot fire ball in the sky
is anything but mellow.
The ginger hair of a Weasley
marks them and who they are.
You would know where they were
from very far.

All of these things
we see every day.
Come from red, yellow, blue
it is the truth, I say.
So the next time you look
into this world of ours
remember where it comes from
in many, many hours.

SMSMP Poem

This was written for my Creative Writing Class. It's called an SMSMP Poem because we go simile, metaphor, simile, metaphor, personification. My teacher really liked it, so I thought I would post it.


I'm like an iPod full of songs,
each song a different emotion.
My happiness, my despair,
my anxiousness, my devotion.
I have different personalitites
all joining together to make me.
My exotic side, my shy side,
all like a tornado, wild and free.

I am a playlist of feelings,
all different yet making up the same.
A hard metal song
or a slow acoustic sway.
A preppy broadway song
or a heart wrenching country tune.
I am a bubblegum pop song
or an angry rock song sending you to your tomb.

I am like the different colors
and iPod can be.
Some nice and simple,
others bright and whacky.
Sunshine yellow
on a happy day,
dark dreery black
when all happiness seems to have gone away.

I am the solitude you feel
with your headphones in your ears.
In your own little world
away from all your peers.
I am the dancing in your room
where no one can see.
I am the bobbing of a head
on a bus through the city.

The roar of the headphones
the soft whisper of the button pad,
quiet and calm
or loud and mad.
Each factor of an iPod
comes together as one
and that one is me
filled with different traits, but still fun.

Miracle

How is this possible?
This wonder
this miracle
this phenomenon
called birth.
A little creature
a little human
a little baby
inside of you.
It kicks
against
the skin
inside.
Bump bump
bump bump
a song
it sings.
Nine months
thirty-six weeks
two-hundred fifty-two
odd days.
All leading up to
one moment
of screaming
of pain
of love.
A love
that lives
forever
as the baby grows
bigger and bigger.
A newborn
a toddler
a child
and adolescent.
A teenager
a young adult
and finally
a parent.
Repeating
the cycle
forever
never ending
a miracle
called birth.

St. Patrick's Day

Green.
Yellow and blue.
Trees, plants,
mirky, dirty water.
Moss growing on a rock.
The cover of a book,
a royal emerald or jade.
Rich, wet grass
swaying with the wind.
The old, worn
Statue of Liberty
that was once as copper
as a brand new penny.
A tiny frog
on a lilly pad.
A cartoon alien
taking of the world.
And finally,
a bright green
four leafed clover;
a shamrock.

The Mistake: Revised

I brought in my poem, The Mistake (original version below) to my creative writing class to get feedback, so I made some changes based on what everyone said. This is the finished product.


The Mistake

She was so beautiful
before the mistake
that wish she made
to make her "perfect".

She didn't know
how much she was loved
how truly perfect
she was in everyone's eyes.

I wish I could go back
and let her know
how I really see her
let her really know.

Now she's in that white building
getting "fixed"
but can she ever be truly fixed?
Will she ever be the same again?

I'm not really sure
but I do hope so
because I love her with all my heart
and I want things to just go back to how they were.

We all thought she knew
how dangerous that was
how pointless that was
how terrible that was.

Maybe now she will learn from her mistake;
that mistake known as an eating disorder.

Prince Charming?

I don't believe
in Prince Charming.
A knight
in shining armour
to save me from
all things bad.
There is no
man who is perfect.
There is no
way to escape
this world
we live in.
There is bad
there is struggle
there is
no escaping.
No one will
be there to
sweep me off
my feet.
Just a couple
of guys to
go in and out
of my life.
They might
like me
but never
love me.
They will not
save me
from my distress.
No thank you,
this damsel
would rather
stay alone.
Because I know
there is no
Prince Charming
just a boy
out there
being average
and normal.
But maybe
he can
save me
from something
worth while;
myself.

The Big Question

Do you believe in love? I don't know if I do....




Love. Four letters. One word. A verb. An adjective. A noun. An emotion. A feeling. A way of life? Called "a feeling of warm personal attachment or deep affection, as for a parent, child, or friend." and, "sexual intercourse; copulation." Twenty-eight defintions in the dictionary. Hundreds of definitions in the mouths of millions. But what is it really?

Is love something you feel for another person? Is it the way a parent hold a child's hand as they cross the street? Is it the tender kiss a couple shares each time they part? Is it standing in front of a bullet, protecting a friend, lover, mother, father, sibling, stranger? Or is it just a myth? A fairy tale made to give people false hope?

Love is often written about in books, watched in movies and TV shows, and supposedly lived every day. But is it really? Is that fluttering in your heart from that single touch really love, or is it just lust? Or bad sushi? Maybe it is your body telling you to stay away because surely, he will break your heart when he cheats on you with your best friend. But no, you didn't listen to the abort signal, you were too busy being in love right? Of course.

Love is often thrown around casually. "I love you" are the three most used words in the world. We say it to our friends, our family, our love interests. We even say it to strangers sometimes. "Excuse me, you dropped you book." They'd say as you would excitedly reply, "Ohmygosh, I love you!" And you will have forgotten their face not five minutes later. It is used in almost every relationship you will ever have. "I love you." Will be the memorable part in the relationship when you are finally convinced it's actually true. That is, until six months later when you break up. Right, you were in love. What else is new?

And then, love could just be how you feel about your family. Your mother whose body you lived in for nine months, your father who taught you how to throw a ball. Your sister who borrows your clothes, your brother who annoys the heck out of you. Your grandma who bakes you cookies and your grandpa who reads the newspaper each morning. But even this "love" might not really be love. It could easily be just our bodies reaciton to the flesh and blood that makes ourselves up.

What is love, really? Is it a nickname, "Hey, love.", or is it a goodbye "I'll see you later. I love you.", or is it just a word? A four letter word. A verb. An adjective. A noun. An emotion. A feeling. A way of life. "A feeling of warm personal attachment or deep affection, as for a parent, child, or friend." "Sexual intercourse; copulation." Or maybe, love is just simply that; love.

Untitled

I was inspired to write this by the song Madeline by Tickle Me Pink. I've never known anyone who has commited suicide but somehow I can write about it. I know too many suicide songs...


Crying herself to sleep every night
screaming the names of those who
let her down
yeah, they let her down.
No one knew how she was hurting
that she was carving those words into her life
drowning in tears
yeah, she drowned.

If I could go back
I'd let her know
I loved her
I love her.
She's gone now
never to come back
but I want her to know
I loved her
I love her.

I never got to say goodbye
so here it is
I'll say, goodbye
I'm saying goodbye.
I never knew
how much pain she was in
she kept it inside
she would just hide
her feelings.

If Icould go back
I'd let her know
I'll miss her
I miss her.
She's gone now
never to come back
but I want her to know
I'll miss her
I miss her.

She was my best friend
I need her to know
I'm sorry!
I am so sorry!
I should've been there
should've helped
when she called me
I'm sorry!
I am so sorry!
I didn't hear the cries
I didn't hear the cries
I'm sorry!
I am so sorry!

If I could go back
I'd let her know
I loved her
I love her.
She's gone now
never to come back
but i want her to know
I'll miss her
I miss her.

I am so sorry.

I Am In Love

Watching the stars
and counting
until I lose
my count.
Thinking about
the things that
could've been
would've been
if I would have just spoken up
and told you
the truth.
But I didn't
it is too late
to let you know
how I feel.
Another crush,
love, desire
gone to waste
because of my fear
of being rejected.
Why can't I just
but it behind
me, say what
I need to say
what I feel.
Because I
am a coward.
A hopeless romantic coward.
He is the sparkly rainbow crayon
in the Crayola box
that I'm too afriad to use
in fear of it ending up gone.
The gorgeous
dress that cost
a fortune
that sits in the closet
in fear of getting
it ruined.
He is everything
I love that
I don't have
because I'm
too afraid of
it going to waste.
I am stupid
I am afraid
I am a wimp
I am in love.

The Mistake

This is not true, I was inspired by the song MyFriendJane by NeverShoutNever!


She was so beautiful
before that mistake
that wish she made
to make her "perfect".

She didn't know
how much she was loved
how truly perfect
she was in my eyes.

I wish I could go back
and let her know
how I really feel
let her really see.

Now she's in that white building
getting "fixed"
but can she ever be truly fixed?
Will she ever be the same again?

I'm not really sure
but I do hope so
because I love her with all of my heart
and I want things to just go back to how they were.

I thought she knew
how dangerous that was
how pointless that was
how terrible that was.

Maybe now she will learn from her mistake;
an eating disorder.

Tell Me

Tell me you love me
I'll tell you don't lie.
Tell me you hate me
I'll tell you that's fine.

Tell me you don't care
I'll tell you the same.
Tell me you won
I'll tell you it's just a stupid game.

Tell me you hate drama
I'll tell you you're a poser.
Tell me you'll miss me
I'll tell you I need some closure.

Tell me you're ok
I'll tell you that's not true.
Because even if I come off a certain way
I still love you.